16 Years of Winning vs. Donald J. Trump

June 14, 2025;
no AI used.

SIXTEEN YEARS AGO

today, on June 14, 2009, I published one of my earliest attempts at satire on my first fake news website, Fairly Unbalanced. The story was about Donald Trump and Iran. That very same day I was tracking, intently via Twitter, protests in Iran following their presidential election, which saw Mahmoud Ahmadinejad win amid allegations of voting irregularities.

Yes, 16 years ago today I was 16 years old — and, a very normal child.

My work has been recorded for the Back Row of History by the Wayback Machine, a truly wonderful resource that I’m sure they’ll destroy soon enough. In my attempt-at-funny June 2009 piece, I satirized dictators and Donald Trump while offering a (hopefully somewhat clear) undertone of support for acts of civil disobedience. Take a look:

Today, June 14th, 2025, Donald Trump is the President of the United States. It’s also his birthday. Naturally, he is celebrating by bombing Iran. With that context, my teenage attempt at satire is, well, perhaps a bit strange. To honor this coincidence, I’m declaring today, June 14th, “International Sometimes Weekly Day.”

But, back to 2009: A month later, in July 2009, I received Donald Trump’s autograph in the mail, on the very same day as Stephen Baldwin and Conan O’Brien. Very normal, indeed! In a signed book, Donald Trump wrote: TO: NICK NEVER GIVE UP AND ALWAYS THINK BIG.

And yes, two years later during my senior year of high school, in April 2011, I did speculate affirmatively on the possibility of Donald Trump running for president (at 2:03am, on a school night). See relevant tweets below:

Then, I launched this publication, Sometimes Weekly, four years later in February 2015, during my senior year of college.

But I didn’t achieve any level of notoriety until a whole month later.

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THE FIRST

mention I have of “Trump.Foundation” in my records is preserved for the Back Row of History through a Google Docs version history timestamp: January 13, 2015.

From this well-preserved, semi-alarming ones and zeroes perspective you can see where I highlighted the instructions for an 800 word essay on leadership, deleted it entirely, and replaced it with: “Trump.Foundation: Buying all Trump top-level domains before Donald.”

Later that day, the domain name was mine.

After purchasing the domain name, Trump.Foundation, I did absolutely nothing with it and promptly forgot. I was in the final semester of college, after all, and had better things to do than build a Trump-based parody empire.

And so a month later, in February 2015, I registered this website, SometimesWeekly.com, and published the very first entry: an Open Letter to Men’s Wearhouse.

Then, another month later, on March 23rd, 2015—the day after my 22nd birthday—I received a phone call from my Mom.

“Nick,” she said. “You’ve got mail here… from the Trump Organization.”

I was immediately intrigued. Of course, as you can imagine, I assumed it was probably another Donald Trump autograph. In addition to the autographed book, my childhood bedroom (yes, painted blood red, very cool — no Freudian or Jungian interpretation needed!) also had a personalized-and-signed headshot of Donald Trump hanging on the wall.

Sure, it had been six years since I had written to Donald Trump back in 2009, but it wasn’t uncommon for celebrity autographs to arrive at my childhood home even years after my initial burst of requests (which ultimately included responses from: Jimmy Carter, Leslie Nielsen, Alex Trebek, Bob Barker, Billy Mays, Bob Saget, Larry King, Bob Dole, Colin Powell, and Matt Lauer).

In fact, a week after I received mail from the Trump Organization, I received a letter from the actor Victor Garber a full six years after I had written to him, with a signed headshot and a note apologizing for the years-long delay. “Please accept my apologies for taking so long to send this picture,” it reads. “The truth is, it was buried in a drawer that I haven’t looked through for a very long time. So sorry,”

“The Trump Organization?” I repeated back to my Mom in disbelief. “Open it,” I told her.

I heard the envelope rip open, some papers shuffle around, a pause, and then a gasp.

“Nicholas!” my Mom screamed. “What did you do?!”

“What?!” I shouted back, confused and already beginning to laugh.

“It’s a Cease and Desist Demand!”

As she read the Demand over the phone, I laughed with delight: the whole thing had worked, and it didn’t even take much effort. My Mom, for her part, was horrified.

Yes, it was very easy to annoy Donald Trump, after all.

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I SERIOUSLY

contemplated my response. This was a direct threat of an expensive legal battle by Donald Trump’s attorney, with the Cease and Desist Demand noting that“Mr. Trump considers this to be a very serious matter” and all necessary and appropriate actions would be taken to halt my blatant and unauthorized use of his precious Trump trademark.

As I considered the infinite potentialities of every possible reply, I updated the Trump.Foundation website making it clear the domain was not associated with Donald Trump or the Trump trademark. I figured that my Good Faith ownership of Trump.Foundation might qualify as a parody, and be protected as free speech, especially given my personal history of satirizing Mr. Trump on Fairly Unbalanced when I was a wee lad.

Then, I promptly blew past the attorney’s demandedWritten Assurance Deadline of March 30th, 2015 without responding. And, if you’re keeping track at home, March 30th, 2015 is the very same day Victor Garber found my letter buried in his drawer and wrote back after six years.

Finally, a week an a half later, I made my move.

I deployed the Art of the Deal and responded to Donald Trump’s attorney with my demands.

I Never Gave Up and Thought Big, and now I was $39.99 richer!

And with that $39.99, I purchased a new domain name, TronaldDump.Foundation, which I recently reacquired as part of Sometimes Weekly’s rapidly growing Trump.Holdings subsidonym brand, which includes .Dog, .Attorney, and of course the legacy brand, .Singles.

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YES,

when I was 16 years old in June 2009 and lobbed my first wordbomb in the general direction of Donald J. Trump, I was a very normal child, indeed.

And yes, when I was 22 years old in March 2015 and was nearly sued by Donald J. Trump, I didn’t know I would spend the the next decade thinking about, writing of, and living in his unreality: a poorly-staged production that so clearly reflects his inner darkness.

In my ongoing Battle against Mr. Trump:

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FINALLY, THE CONCLUSION

Last month, in May 2025, I wrote a letter to Warren Buffett, 94, to congratulate him on his legacy at Berkshire Hathaway and to wish him well in retirement, which he plans to begin at the end of this year. Yes, a very normal child.

I expressed to Mr. Buffett my appreciation for his generous giving and for his participation in America’s public discourse, specifically his advocacy for fair taxation and his strong-arming of other billionaires toward historic giving pledges.

In my letter, I contrasted his life with “this new breed of billionaires” and their “phallic-shaped rockets,” admitting I was worried about their “seeming lack of conscience” and “unideology.”

With these important distinctions drawn, I asked Mr. Buffet: “how have you stayed in touch with your humanity?”

A few weeks later, I received my letter back and on the bottom, Mr. Buffett wrote: “by having wonderful friends, beginning with my dad.“

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And so, on this Father’s Day Weekend, let us ignore the poorly-staged national production, the unreality, and instead choose optimism, as we carefully consider the character of our leaders, and of our neighbors, and determine who to trust and admire during these difficult and historic times.

Yes, the time for simple ones and zeroes has passed. Now, perhaps more than ever, we must acknowledge our shared reality, while remaining firmly committed to preserving American democracy. The darkness must be rejected. We must stand in the light.

From the Back Row of History, I wish you a very Happy International Sometimes Weekly Day.

Sincerely, your pal;

Nick Butler
Albany, NY
June 14, 2025

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Addendum: A Twist Ending!

A few months after publishing this entry, I received a letter from the American actor and S.W.P.C. Member in Good Standing Mr. Tom Hanks that was, coincidentally, dated the same day as this piece: June 14, 2025. In retroactive celebration of the inaugural International Sometimes Weekly Day, it felt entirely appropriate to share that letter here: